Master and i were having an interesting little discussion last night.

We talked about a lot of things:

• How lucky and fortunate i am for one thing, to have Him as my Master.
• How i would never run away; i don’t have the capacity.
• What it really means to be Owned.

I’ll start with the last thing first. What it really means to be Owned. In O/our world. YMMV.

Master suggested making a blog entry listing all the things i haven’t or wouldn’t give up for Him. My premise on that has always been that there is nothing i wouldn’t do or give up for Him. Because i already crossed that line into His Ownership. He Owns me. I have given up all choice of what i will/won’t do. I agreed to my Master’s limits on day one as something i could live with and now the point of choice for me is well past. Therefore, i cannot refuse Him anything. That’s what makes me an Owned slave. I lack choices, or more specifically, i only have the choices given me by Him.

I have nothing that doesn’t belong to Him. Anything and everything i once thought of as mine is really His. Like buying a furnished home. All the furnishings that came with the home belong to the new owner as well as the house itself. Everything i have Master owns because He owns me. I’m not even sure He thinks this way, but i can see it making sense no other way.

I’ve heard other slaves say that they could/would not give up certain things to their Masters. Specifically finances. Their money. They could not give up that much control. The way i see it is this: if you truly are a slave and are truly Owned by another human being, you have agreed and trust this individual with your very life. Why not your money as well? Don’t you trust them enough to plan for your well being and future?

It’s like good stewardship. I implicitly trust my Master and Owner to use wise stewardship with me, including managing my money and looking out for my financial future and providing for me in the event that something ever happened to him.

Now, we do not reside together. Master, in fact, has never even seen my financial records. He has some idea of how much i’ve got and he has never asked to have control of any of it, other than helping me save it. But it is His just the same. For how could i give myself totally over and not include all of what i own as well? A slave really owns nothing. Being property herself, everything she has by default belongs to her Master. If anything should ever happen to the relationship, i trust my Owner to either return to me what i came with, or provide for me to be able to take care of myself.

So much for what i have. What would i do for Him?

This is an interesting question, because at first blush there may be things i can conceive of that i wouldn’t do. Like a gang bang for instance. Fortunately Master doesn’t do other species (ie, animals, vegetables, minerals or aliens), so that is not something i have to worry about, lol. But realistically, say my Master wanted to share me with another; which, btw, is something He says He is not really into. But if he did, and this was exactly the example i used last night, i had said i would run away.

Bottom line, i would never run away. Master noted that it’s just something i wouldn’t want to do. But i would never leave because of not wanting to do something. Because of having a dislike or distaste for something. My goodness, i have already crossed that bridge a couple of times at least: as in the watersports, drinking piss, needles in my nipples, breast whipping, pussy whipping; all things i would not particularily want to do/done to me. But i’ve done them. And every single time without exception, contrary to my belief that i would run away, i have instead grown that much closer to my Master. Because i’m already across that line into Ownership. Master said it’s at that moment after said “thing” is done that i’ve been taken over the line; I accept His will.

I say, however, it has nothing to do with accepting or not accepting His will in each instance, because there are those moments of resistance, of wanting to pull back, or out, or say “No!” and refuse… That doesn’t make me any less His slave. That doesn’t negate His Ownership. Those are just areas of resistance that need to be overcome one way or another. The overcoming deepens the enslavement. It doesn’t create it. But maybe i’ve misunderstood my Master. Really, i think we are on the same page in this.

Now backing up once more. I don’t have the capacity to run away.

This is true.

There was a day, not long ago, Master got upset with me for something. I was pushing his buttons that day and He decided to give me a day off from him, so to speak. I did not have to obey any of my rules that day. I did not have to do my devotion that day. I was not to im, text, email, or phone him that day. Needless to say, i was gutted. I cried for long portions of that Friday, first of all because i didn’t know what it was that i had done wrong. I remember feeling very needy the day before and voicing what i wanted/needed and how much i was missing Him, etc. etc. I believe i was lessening His enjoyment of Owning me in that instance and that was part of my lesson on that lonely, long day.

Now,

I had serious concerns about being Owned by this man on that particular Friday. I felt it was a very unjust, very cruel punishment. Master corrected me early that next week and added that Friday was not a punishment but a gift. And even in my anguish, looking back i could see how right He was. I learned that in spite of it all, He was still the best thing that has ever happened to me and that i couldn’t imagine my life without Him in it. Ever. That was indeed a great gift. I will never leave. Even if a way of escape was offered to me, i wouldn’t go through the open door. I simply do not have it in me to do so.

And on to number one.

I am indeed very lucky, very very fortunate to have this man as my Owner and Master. I have touched on this before in my blog, but there are many reasons for my feelings.

1. Master is a fine quality human being.
2. He has a very high level of intelligence.
3. He has a great sense of humor.
4. He is honorable and true to his word.
5. He is not perfect. (who wants a perfectionist? yuck)
6. He has vision. He can look far ahead and imagine how things could/should be.
7. He’s great with money.
8. He seems to have an innate sense of how i think. This baffles me sometimes.
9. He therefore handles me correctly and i’ve flourished under His hand.
10. He is personally and professionally successful.
11. He has a great sense of who he is. This is unusual in this day and age. So many hide behind masks.
12. He loves his children.
13. He is wise.
14. He loves music
15. He has a wealth of knowledge.
16. He challenges me to new heights, personally and professionally.
17. He is fair. (even though He’ll deny it sometimes)
18. He is unmovably the Boss.
19. He is 100% fixed on Owning me, specifically me, and no one but me
20. He knows what He is doing. He is sure of Himself.

The list could go on and on, and it isn’t particularily ordered in any sort of way, just things of importance that popped into my mind. Suffice to say i am my Master’s biggest fan, lol. Seriously, He is the perfect fit for me and i don’t know how i ever found Him. That was a very lucky day. I love you my Master.